(no subject)

[fieryknowledge]

Ten years.

It'd been ten long years. Ten years in the dark, fighting back to keep their world safe. Countries had long since ceased to matter in the Long Night. They'd all changed in those years, but none as much as the man that had finally returned. The King that had finally returned.

When Ignis heard the news, he couldn't believe it. Oh, there was never any doubt that his liege would return, but it'd been so long. So long since he'd seen that precious face. The determination in his voice as he called on the Crystal and the kings of old was something that Ignis could still recall with perfect clarity even if he couldn't quite remember what he looked like in that moment. Right then, he'd been ready to die, all to keep Noctis from the fate that he'd been shown. He could still remember the raw pain in Gladio's voice and the tears in Prompto's. That was when he knew that he couldn't leave his brothers.

He couldn't leave him.

Seeing Noctis again had been a bit of a shock. He was a man grown now and the first thing Ignis found himself thinking was just how stunning his eyes were, closely followed by the simple fact that Noctis needed a shave. Instead of letting his mind linger on either of those, he simply welcomed him back, a small smile gracing his still scarred lips.

Things happened quickly then. A plan was made now that they knew their target and had the means to fight him. It was like old times, that night. A roaring fire and a carefully prepared meal. Conversation around the fire, met with small smiles and vaguely hollow eyes to catch the flickering light and each word out of Noctis' mouth made Ignis' chest ache. He knew what the next day would bring. He'd seen it in his nightmares for years now, but he'd never shared that vision with anyone. He couldn't bear to do so. Not when it would break their hearts just like it'd broken his.

When dinner was a pleasant memory, Gladio caught Ignis' gaze, shooting him a half-smile as he canted his head toward their oldest friend before he stood up and excused himself with a half-hearted claim that he was tired, only to end up dragging Prompto along with him. Ignis watched them duck into the tent with a soft chuckle and a shake of his head.

"Well, it seems like it's just the two of us now."

Comments

[thenightisyoung]

Ten years.

They had told him more than once, now, it truly was ten years, but nothing in his mind could agree with that possibility. Nothing he had gone through, the time he had spent, the things he had done, added up to ten years of time having passed, ten years of his life having been stolen from him as he floated endlessly, replaying things again and again in his mind, until he had come to an understanding within himself. An acceptance of what must be done. The Chosen King would do it for the people he loved and the sacrifices that had been made.

But he looked at each of them and saw the age written across their faces. The mirror in the bathroom, when he had his first private moment, had let him stare into an unfamiliar face. To touch a stranger's face with his eyes, slowly, before returning to his friends and making no mention of it at all. They didn't need to deal with his shock.

And so the night passed, one final night with the stars brilliant over head, the crackle of the fire familiar as breathing, the memory of this same sort of night repeated in his head again and again and again. At Ignis' words, the corner of his mouth lifted, amused. "Just us, now." His head turned enough to glance in the direction the other two had gone. "Seems like there's more I missed than just the expected. When did those two...?"

It didn't take a genius to catch the connection between Gladio and Prompto, but if they weren't going to bring it up, he would.

[fieryknowledge]

Those two? Oh, that was a story all its own, filled with bumbling words and grumpy Shields and one very tired adviser playing a mediator until the others could figure it all out. After all, Ignis had always been a dab hand at everyone else's love lives. It'd been his own that had gone long neglected in lieu of his duty. He'd long since resigned himself to it and even now, when he saw that smile on Noct's face, he kept trying to remind himself of that.

"Those two are an insufferable mess and have been for the last two years. Most of it is Iris' doing, if I'm being honest. My part in all of it was rather small, I'm afraid."

Lies. It was small at all, just mostly unseen. Even now, Ignis liked to work in the shadows when he could.

"They're good for each other. Gladio grounds Prompto when he needs it, while Prompto manages to do the opposite for our venerated Shield. Unfortunately, there isn't a lot of time for them. The three of us are spread a bit then these last few years, but they make the best of the time they have. I... would advise caution when entering the tent for a while."

[thenightisyoung]

The look Noctis gave Ignis suggested that he didn't fully believe that Ignis only had a 'small' part in the connection between those two, but the last comment did bring a quiet laugh out of him as he shook his head. "Didn't need to tell me. It was pretty obvious from the blush on Prompto's face." He leaned his head back and tilted his eyes up to the stars, the ruddy firelight pouring across his face.

"It's beautiful." The stars? The night? The life? Gladio and Prompto being together? Who knew what he was speaking about, but his eyes didn't leave the sky. Slowly he took a breath of that fresh night air with the scent of wood smoke and his eyes drifted shut like it was the best thing he had ever smelled. For the moment, it was.

"And you? ...For the last two years? Five? ...Ten?" His voice hitched ever so slightly on the last.

[fieryknowledge]

The quiet laugh made Ignis smile. When he glanced up, saw the wash of warm, flickering light dancing along his liege's face, he was captivated and couldn't look away. In the back of his mind, he quietly agreed that yes, it was beautiful, but there was no doubt the sight he had in mind.

When had his young prince grown up so much? How long had it been since Ignis had felt that odd sensation in his chest? When was the last time a simple question had made him pause as much as Noct's did?

"... I am as I've always been."

Loyal. Alone. Yours.

[thenightisyoung]

"No." Noctis' head came up and he looked firmly at Ignis, meeting his gaze from across the fire. "Ten years changes a man. ...Neither of us are the same man as we were." But the corner of his mouth lifted, slightly. "But maybe not entirely." He felt exactly the same and yet he knew he had changed drastically, inside and out.

Noctis got up and moved his chair closer to Ignis, taking the chance to get to study him. Time had done well for Ignis; he was more handsome then ever. The scars, what remained after everything had been said and done and power spent, did not detract from those good looks. It felt... almost unfair to think such a thing. It wasn't worthy of him, given everything that Ignis had given for him, given up for him, to think that there was something even more he could ask of his brother, his friend, his advisor, his... everything.

[fieryknowledge]

That small smile struck Ignis. How many times had he seen that same smile on his prince? Something small and almost shy, barely there and easy to miss if one wasn't looking for it, but Ignis... oh, he saw them all. Each one neatly filed away in his mind, dredged back up during the Long Night when things looked their darkest, when nightmares pushed them all toward exhaustion and madness.

This smile was for him and he couldn't help but return it, a rare thing for him these days as well.

"I've... had my dalliances here and there, but never for very long and not recently. In the end, there hasn't been anyone that I wanted to stay with for long."

[thenightisyoung]

When Ignis smiled at him, it never failed to bring out some of the child in him, even all these years later, that just wanted approval it felt like he had so rarely gotten. Like maybe his father really would forgive him for accidentally destroying that vase some dignity from another country had given him, or like maybe he hadn't done everything wrong and doomed the world to eternal night. While he had come to accept what must be done, the certain knowledge of his Fate, he had never stopped missing the people he loved. It had been the hardest part about accepting his fate.

The fact that he would leave behind, and so deeply hurt, his friends.

"A pity, that, because someone will get very lucky if they can have your heart." Noctis' words didn't hold the anger or self-pity they would have once, screaming at Bahamut, but there was the notion that perhaps his death would do them some good. Ignis, Gladio, and Prompto would be free. Ignis could finally find someone, someone who would be so damned lucky as to have Ignis at their side. All he wanted to do was survive to make sure that he could do what he needed to do, to free them. To free all of them from the darkness.

But it didn't stop his heart from wishing he could have that for tonight, as selfish as the thought was.

[fieryknowledge]

"My heart hasn't been the same since you left. I guard it rather fiercely now. Gladio tried his hardest for a while after the dark fell but not even our esteemed Shield could break through."

Did he just admit that he'd had some kind of torrid affair with Gladio? Indeed he had and while Ignis wasn't one to be so open, Noctis was his oldest friend. He'd been part of Ignis' life for as long as he could remember. Not telling him, not being so honest, would've been just wrong.

Still, he hadn't wanted to add to his friend's burden. Not when it was already so heavy.

[thenightisyoung]

That actually did get a brief look of surprise across Noctis' face. Gladio and Ignis had...? Huh. Surprise melted away into a sort of sadness because the idea of Ignis guarding his heart so deeply that even Gladio wouldn't be able to get in... it hurt. Was it because of what happened before he had been sucked into the crystal? Something after?

"...Why?" Quiet, barely heard over the crackle of the fire. "Why not let him in?" If anyone out there could have, wouldn't it have been Gladio who could understand the sort of pain Ignis had been going through?

Noctis can't even imagine the possible real truth, that Ignis' heart belonged elsewhere.

[fieryknowledge]

The surprise earned Noctis a wry smile before he let his gaze drop. Right then, he couldn't let himself look at those lovely midnight eyes watching him. Not when he had to fight off the urge to drop to his knees before his liege and beg him not to do what they both knew had to be done. Instead, he sighed and reached up to pinch at the bridge of his nose, dislodging his glasses for a moment.

"Gladio is a good man and if I'm being brutally honest with you, not a stranger to my bed. Did you know we dated for a long time, back when we were all still in Insomnia? I suppose you could go so far as to consider him my first love. As much as I cared for Gladio, I found my thoughts occupied by duty and other things more often than not so I called things off between us and focused on that. We remained the closest of friends, though, even to this day."

[thenightisyoung]

Younger Noctis would have wrinkled his nose at the mention of Gladio and Ignis together in bed, but it was proof of just how much had changed in the time since their last that he only nodded, though the surprise returned. "I didn't," he admitted, wondering just how much else he had missed in that time if it had escaped him that his two closest people were dating.

"...but there's a big difference between then and-" He couldn't say 'and now' because now was so much later, so he fumbled slightly and corrected himself to, "ten years ago." So why hadn't Ignis allowed Gladio back into his life, if, from the sound of it, Gladio still wanted to be in that part of Ignis' life?

[fieryknowledge]

"Indeed there is."

And there was. The world had changed around them and even if they hadn't wanted to change, there was no choice. In this world, being able to adapt meant surviving. When Noctis left, depression settled over Ignis as deep as the darkness that took over. Gladio had recognized it and in time, helped Ignis realize the reason as well. The Shield couldn't win Ignis' heart because he'd already given it to someone else and it'd taken losing him to finally see it.

"When the night fell, we tried again but I couldn't commit. There was something stopping me. Someone stopping me. I couldn't be in love with someone else when my heart was already lost. I always told myself it was duty or some such, but that wasn't it. It just took me years to realize it."

There was a pause, then Ignis shifted to look back up at Noctis, his spearmint eyes vividly bright in the firelight as they searched that beloved face.

"... it was you."

[thenightisyoung]

It feels like his heart simply stopped at those three words, eyes slowly going wide until they were vividly blue against the crimson light cast upon them. Ignis... Ignis had already given his heart-

He swallowed, saliva suddenly thick in his mouth. So many thoughts buzzed through his head but none of them seemed right to actually say aloud. None of the thoughts were worthy to respond to such a statement. So, after a long breath, Noctis decided to not bother with everything that was trying to rush through his mind. Instead, he crossed the small space between them and dipped down, taking Ignis' chin in his hand, and touching their lips together.

It was warm, it was electric, but it was short before Noctis pulled his head back, letting out a breath. "...that was unfair of me," he whispered.

[fieryknowledge]

There wasn't even a hint of hesitation as Ignis' hand snapped out to wrap slim fingers around the back of Noctis' neck, gently urging him back in and this time, Ignis was the one that initiated the kiss. When he shifted back to given them a little distance, he couldn't help but sigh against Noct's lips, his eyes still closed.

"No, it was unfair to expect me to be content with just one. Not when I've finally had the chance to learn what you taste like."

Ten years ago, that Ignis wouldn't have dared to manhandle his king as such. Hell, five years ago, he would've imagined it, but never gone through with it. This Ignis was different, though. He knew that time was a precious thing and any moment could be their last.

[thenightisyoung]

To hear that from Ignis warmed his heart as much as it pierced it. Noctis' next breath shuddered from his lungs, his eyes closed, just listening to his breathing. There was the brief moment of sorrow at the idea that perhaps they might have once been able to make this something, back then, before there was so little time left. Now... Could he live with the idea of hardening, hurting Ignis' heart further?

"We all know... what tomorrow will bring," he whispered, softly. "I already held your heart for so long. I want to make sure your heart is free." Not encaged forever because of his death. How did he give Ignis even a little back of everything the other had given to him? He owed Ignis, Gladio, Prompto... everything. It felt like he could give them nothing except the world, and that wasn't enough.

[fieryknowledge]

"I've seen it."

It was the first time Ignis had told anyone. Not even his dear friend and confidant Gladio knew the heavy burden Ignis had carried in the back of his mind in the long years since Altissia. The sight of his king, pinned to the throne like a butterfly. The pale cast to skin gone cold. The knowledge that those beautiful eyes that rivaled a clear night sky that would never open again.

"... years ago. When I went to the altar at Altissia to save you. I was... gifted a vision of it and it's haunted me ever since. Why do you think I did everything I could to keep you from that fate? Knowing what that damned Ring will ask of you is vastly different than seeing it. Feeling it and don't think I don't remember how it felt. I won't let you go through it alone. I won't."

[thenightisyoung]

Now Ignis had every ounce of Noctis trained on him, staring down into his friend's eyes with his own having gone wide. Never, not once, had Ignis made any mention of having seen such a vision. A thousand words wanted to bubble up, to demand to know why Ignis hadn't told him, to thank him for not because younger him would have run from it, to know why Ignis hadn't shared in that burden because he damn well could guess that Ignis, of all people, would keep it to himself.

"Ignis-" His words choke up in his throat, and he swallowed around them to get them to finally keep going. "I- damn." And still failed. He bent his head forward and slowly laid his forehead against Ignis', eyes closing. "And I want you all to live." His voice broke, ever so slightly, because he knew what was coming was going to ask of him the ultimate price and the idea of any of them, Ignis most of all, being forced to share in that Fate felt like the gods would have betrayed him entirely.

[fieryknowledge]

No matter how many nights that vision haunted him, Ignis kept it to himself. Every inch of it had been scrutinized until he could remember it with startling clarity even when awake and aware. Hells, he could remember the way the chamber sounded, like all the air suddenly pulled from a room.

He wouldn't have it.

With a sigh, he let his eyes close as well, long fingers moving to settle at the base of Noctis' neck, up into soft hair as if he couldn't stand not touching his liege for too long.

"I've been living the last ten years and it hasn't been all its cracked up to be. No. I will stand by your side, as I always have, while you face your fate and I have a feeling that our brothers will do the same. We won't allow you to go so easily. Let the gods come for us. We've already beaten them once. They can't stand against us now."

[thenightisyoung]

His fingers clench as tears threaten at the edges of his eyes. For so long, he had fought in that place of light, refusing to accept what was to be his fate and undoubtedly, the fate of his friends. It had been the belief that they would have a better world in the end that brought him to that place of acceptance, and now... now, damn them, they wanted him to keep fighting.

Bless them.

Damn them.

He didn't know anymore. What he knew was that he wanted them to live, but it felt like, in Ignis' words, was the idea that his death would kill them, one way or the other.

He swallowed thickly and brought his second hand up to cup Ignis' cheek, holding him, keeping their heads together. What could he say to that that his hands couldn't? Had Gladio, Prompto, and Ignis made some kind of pact, or was this Ignis alone right now? There was so much they didn't know, for all of Ignis' vision, of what the Gods had told Noctis.

Damn the Gods. Hadn't they done enough for him? He wanted to do something for them. For Ignis. "...what would you have of me?" he whispered quietly. "I can give you tonight."

[fieryknowledge]

What would you have of me?

The question made Ignis' chest ache. How many answers could he give? A day. A week. A year. A decade. A lifetime, however small that may be. A shaky sigh rolled free between them as Noct's hands warmed Ignis' skin and down into his bones. It was a chill he hadn't noticed before, a chill a decade old and now that there was some shred of hope, of light, he was loathe to let it go.

"I'll take it and give you my tomorrows if you'll have them. For now... another kiss and a chance to forget what tomorrow might bring. Please."

[thenightisyoung]

"You've already given me those," Noctis whispered, and despite himself, his own promise to himself, he felt the beginning of tears welling up in his eyes. Gladio, Ignis, Prompto... they had given him everything already, including their lives, and yet he could give them so little in return except the chance that they might live on. His hand cupped the elegant line of Ignis' jaw, his thumb running over the delicate line of a scar gained in the protection of him. All three of them bore scars taken because of him. Scars within... scars with out.

But he could at least give Ignis what he wanted. Maybe more than he wanted. It still felt selfish, like he would end up taking Ignis' heart to the grave, but perhaps that was happening no matter what. Was it better to hold the memory of this last night in his heart or to never have it at all?

Noctis shoved aside those thoughts and brought his lips to Ignis', so slowly, easing them together as his hand tilted Ignis up to just the right angle. It felt like a spark jumped between them, right at their lips, when he did so, and it was pure encouragement to bring himself in closer, deepen that kiss and bring it into something solid and true, one that might steal their breath.

Yet he dared to break it, just for a moment, long enough for him to whisper, "tonight, have all of me."

[fieryknowledge]

Each scar was worth it. A memory earned alongside his brothers, defending them. Many of them were silver now, or a faded pink while some were still a vibrant red, showing recent hurts. The scars under his skin were deeper and few of those were healed to silver. Ignis had long since grown used to the numbing effect that deep pain afforded him, but having Noctis there, his voice a soft brush of air against his lips, was a salve he had no idea how much he'd needed.

There was a soft groan of relief when he kissed those words away, his fingers trembling as they mapped out the line of Noctis' jaw and down the side of his neck only to settle over his pulse, as if he had to remind himself that yes, he really was there. It wasn't a fantasy or a nightmare, like so many other nights that the young king had come to Ignis. He was there, his skin warm under Ignis' hands as he coaxed the kiss deeper and deeper.

If Noctis wanted him to have him, then he would.

[thenightisyoung]

Noctis was offering all of himself to Ignis, in small payment to the fact that Ignis had given all of himself for nearly all of his life to his liege. It was so much more than that, though. It was brotherhood, friendship, love, the latter more than anything else. He loved them all, his reasons to do all of this, to offer up his life.

He leaned into that touch, eyes closed and fighting down the urge to groan as this dream felt like reality. How many times had he dreamed about something so similar to this? It was hard, very hard, not to believe this was another dream caught up in the endless, slow swirl of light. Ignis kissing him, the touch of their lips, the tiny catch of the scar at Ignis' lips, the taste of it. The feeling of his hair tickling his fingertips. It was so easy, so much easy than he would have dreamed, to climb into Ignis' lap and straddle him.

[fieryknowledge]

There was a flicker of relief in the back of Ignis' mind that the camp chairs were sturdy enough for Gladio, which meant that it would be sturdy enough to bear both of them. There was an amused rumble from Ignis even as he shifted his grip, fingers spreading along Noct's neck into an almost possessive grasp. The kiss changed as well, from coaxing to eager, a groan of approval rolling in the back of Ignis' throat even as he pulled back just enough to nip at Noct's lower lip before diving right back in for more.

If they just had tonight, then Ignis planned to taste and touch all that he could. His free hand dropped down, deft fingers mapping out the stays on Noct's clothing. Years ago, he could've managed to disrobe him blindfolded after years of helping his sleepy prince change when the younger man was already out like a light or too tired to care about not sleeping in his 'good clothes'. Now, he was sorely out of practice, but his fingers were eager to touch warm skin, to test and see if this was just some cruel dream.

[thenightisyoung]

Gladio couldn't help that he was a big guy. He had proper chairs brought along so that he could flop into one at the end of a long, exhausting day and not worry about breaking the damn thing. At least it meant that it could support the two of them fooling around ten years later. Something Noctis was grateful for right now as the sound from Ignis felt like fingers running down his spine, making him echo the groan quietly. He shifted, helping Ignis to work him out of his clothing, before he started to do the same. There was no familiarity at all, so it was an effort to pull and feel and figure out the outfit so that he might get at more skin beneath.

He'd never had his chance, and now, with fuel added to a fire he had never knowledged before, it felt like an inferno was growing under his skin and threatened to devour him. Maybe he wanted it to, wanted Ignis to. His fingers finally managed to get to the fabric beneath the jacket and he pressed his palm to the heat of it, realizing, perhaps, this really was real. This might actually be happening, the first time it wasn't some deranged method to get him to agree to his destiny but actually happening...

"Ignis." A hungry whisper.

[fieryknowledge]

That voice. Oh, the way his name sounded, whispered out like he was something so wanted... Ignis couldn't resist diving in again, his lips stealing away that sound and replacing it was a low groan that was approval as well as something chiding. Each second that ticked by told him that his king really was there, his skin warm under his seeking fingers, but ten years of waiting had left him wondering the how and why of it all.

Why now? Why not sooner? Why had it taken this damned long for him to be able to tell Noct how he felt?

Duty. It was just that simple.

He pulled back from those tempting lips with a sigh, his hands reluctant to leave Noct's skin but they did. He worked to help Noctis find more points of contact, quiet murmurs encouraging skin to skin with each inch of pale flesh bared to the night air.

"Tell me how you want me. I'm yours."

[thenightisyoung]

What did he ever want but approval? Approval from his father, approval from Gladio, approval from Ignis? Maybe not Prompto, who so badly wanted approval from him, but hearing it now from Ignis was like a shot of heat running through him instead of pride. His touch was bringing this out of the normally stoic man and he wanted more of it, feeling greedy and guilty and wanting and needing and it was almost all too much to handle all at once, bubbling like rising lava beneath his skin. Maybe after so long trapped in that endless domain, new, real emotions alone are overwhelming.

Then Ignis asked for him to talk dirty to him. Hells. All the things he never would have expected to happen except in the depths of his most hidden dreams. Noctis pulled back enough to suck air into tight lungs, licking his lips as Ignis, thank the Six, started helping him out. All he wanted was more contact, more revealed to his eyes, what he hadn't seen in a decade. For Ignis... his King had become a man, with a man's build finally settled in, one that would never have the fullness of his father but was built on strong, lanky muscle.

"You've always been mine." For a moment, Noctis didn't even recognize his own voice in the depths of that tone. That hunger-need-desire. "I want-" How? How was he supposed to pick from every secret thing he had ever dreamed of doing with Ignis?

"I want to go into tomorrow marked by you." Swallow, continue, almost brazen in his words now. "Nails, teeth, everything. I don't plan on explaining why I have a limp." A slight quirk of his lips, amusement layered in heat.